So, what’s really stopping you from going online and finding your ideal mate? Here are 10 of the most common reasons we tend to procrastinate when it comes to finding love online:
1. Safety and privacy. While this is a genuine concern, you can take comfort in the fact that any reputable dating site will make the safety and privacy of its members a top priority. You will always be in control when it comes to disclosing your personal information to other members.
2. Shyness. This is one of the main reasons many of us take a pass when it comes to online dating sites. However, you should realize that internet dating is custom made for shy individuals. Unlike traditional methods, you can slowly ease into things and get to know someone on your terms. With email and messenger services, you needn’t worry about a face-to-face meeting until you’ve gotten to know someone through correspondence first.
3. Doubt about its effectiveness. Does online dating really work, or will you be wasting your time? The truth is that online dating is extremely effective. What other method let’s you carefully craft a personal profile and then get it out there in front of thousands of potential dates within minutes. Years ago, you would have to post a personal ad in the newspaper and then correspond with a few people over the course of a month to find out if they were right for you.
4. Unlike traditional methods, online dating is too cold, calculated, and unromantic. Yes, because of its speed and efficiency, online dating could be perceived as impersonal, but so is a blind date, speed dating, and newspaper personals. If you’re counting on a fairytale romance and hoping that fate delivers Mr or Miss wonderful, you could be in for a long wait.
5. Too competitive. Look at all those great profiles. What chance have you got? Well, the chances are pretty good that you’ll get noticed if you take the time to deliver a decent profile. Read some of the more popular ones, and borrow some ideas. However, never copy any part of someone else’s profile – not even a sentence. This has to come from you. Keep in mind that while there is some decent competition, there will also be a lot of people looking at your profile – it’s all relative.
6. If someone I know sees the ad, I’ll never live it down. To many people this could be a little embarrassing, but you need to put things in perspective. You are doing nothing wrong by posting your profile on a dating site. Online dating is no longer associated with desperate singles and sleazy websites and is a perfectly acceptable way to meet others.
7. Fear of failure/rejection. We all get rejected at some point – it’s how we deal with it that determines our eventual success. If you are rejected, don’t take it personally. There could be many reasons that you were turned down – many, of which, have nothing to do with you personally. The bottom line is that until you learn to deal with rejection, you will have a very hard time making any constructive progress.
8. What if I actually meet someone? Ok, this sounds funny, but it is the classic fear of success that most of us experience from time to time (and not only with dating). You need to be sure of what you want and be mentally prepared to deal with it once it happens. Most of this fear will be centered on expectations. Will you live up someone’s expectations?
9. I’m not ready. I want to lose some weight, get contacts, and get a new wardrobe – and on it goes. The truth is that you will never be as ready as you want to be. There will always be something not quite right – something that needs to be fixed before you put yourself out there. The only solution is to take the first step and just do it – seriously.
10. Online dating is technical, and I’m not a technical person. Well, these days, it takes very little to get on a dating site, create a profile, and start communicating with other singles. In fact, dating sites have made this extremely easy and user friendly. So easy, in fact, that the user age range has increased to include everyone from 18 to 100. If you are truly stumped when it comes to the internet, ask a friend or family member to show you the basics – it’s not that hard.