If you’re under the impression that relationship chemistry is something that just happens, you might want to think again – In fact, the truth may just surprise you. Granted, you probably can’t create chemistry if there is none there to begin with, but if there is even a tiny spark, there are many things you can do to fan the flames.
What is chemistry?
If you’ve never really had a strong chemistry with someone, it can be hard to explain exactly what it is. For many individuals, chemistry is a very strong mental bond that exists between two people. It is taking comfort in the fact that you’re just meant to be together as you share common goals, dreams, and beliefs – you might also share the same pet-peeves and habits.
Start by developing a good rapport
If you don’t have a good rapport, it’s going to be very difficult to develop any sort of chemistry. Be patient: If you’ve only known this person for a short time, try to find things you both have in common. Ideally, it’s better if you’re both passionate about something – this will ensure that the conversation is lively, stimulating and enjoyable. Definitely avoid one-sided conversations where it is obvious that the other person has little interest.
Make them laugh
Not only is laughter fun and enjoyable, it can take the edge off an uncomfortable situation and make us feel at ease with someone. There is no need to overdo it – don’t think you’ve got to be the life of the party or be “on your game” constantly. Be yourself and don’t overdo it. Keep it light and natural. Above all, know the difference between being funny and being obnoxious. Try to find your own style.
Introduce some excitement
Couples who meet under exciting circumstances almost always feel a deeper connection with each other. The mind can associate excitement with the person we are with and often mistakes that adrenaline rush for physical attraction. Any activity that gets your heart pumping will do. For example, watching a horror movie, a roller coaster ride, rock climbing, white water rafting, a hot air balloon …well, you get the point.
Show your date the real you
If you’re holding back and not showing them your real personality, you likely won’t have much chemistry in your relationship. Express yourself by sharing your opinions and thoughts. Don’t try to hide the real you. If they don’t like you for who you are, then it is unlikely you’ll ever develop any real chemistry anyway.
Get a little physical
In order to increase chemistry in relationships, it’s sometimes necessary to use a little non-verbal communication – often this comes in the form of light touching gestures. You should be warned, however, that if you try this too early in the relationship, you could turn them off permanently. Use the utmost discretion here – you must learn to read the situation correctly. Touching gestures could be light touches on the arm or shoulder to emphasize verbal communication, or a light touch to the knee when the other person says something remarkable or funny. Tread lightly here.
Chemistry in relationships can be very powerful, but it doesn’t have to be a complete mystery. You can easily help it along and control it by creating a good rapport, using humor, and creating an exciting atmosphere. Start here, and you may be surprised at the results you get.