In an ideal world, there would be few expectations on a blind date. After all, the real purpose is to meet casually and see if there is a spark. You don’t owe a random person anything and they don’t owe you anything.
Ideally, the meeting should be brief. Over coffee is ideal.
But, as we all know, real life isn’t quite that simple.
Because you are technically on a date (and you’re the guy), then it is up to you to pay. It’s a social norm that we just can’t seem to shake for some reason. Is it fair? No, not really, but that’s just the way it is.
Okay, so how can you have a blind date, but not have to pay $50 for lunch every time you meet someone new? Take them to a fast food restaurant? Nope… That is the worst thing you can do. How about asking them to split the bill? Nope… that is still going to make you look cheap.
Yes, it’s going to make you look cheap, no matter what you do. You could take a leap of faith and invite her to a decent restaurant, hoping that you hit it off. It’s your call, but the chances of her being the one are slim.
For a single guy, this tactic can get quite costly. If you take part in online dating, then there is a good chance that you are on many blind dates in the course of a month. Should you treat them all to a meal at a good restaurant? Well, most guys feel compelled to do just that. But, wow, that can drain your bank account fast!
A better way to do it would be to have a pre-date meeting. This initial “before the date” meet-up should be very informal and brief. Ideally, arrange to meet at a coffee shop, or even in a park. Have a short chat and get a feel for what the other person is like. If you have a good feeling, then arrange to have a proper date. The coffee shop should be upscale, not Dunkin Donuts 🙂
Even an upscale coffee shop is inexpensive though.
There is nothing wrong with doing it this way and it won’t put you in a bad light. She won’t think you’re cheap. If she asks why you aren’t meeting in a restaurant, tell her you have to be somewhere.
Much better than looking cheap and taking her to Mcdonalds – or asking her to pay half.
If you take her to a fast food restaurant then, well, you deserve what you get.
For any guy who is actively looking for someone (dating sites, etc.), then this is the only option you really have unless you’re rich. Resist the temptation to take a complete stranger out for a good meal at a nice restaurant. That comes later.
If she’s not okay with this, then move on. Don’t even set up a meeting. There are plenty more matches on your dating site who will be perfectly okay with it.